GBE, Inklings

Missing Gary

ehg

He’d just returned from his checkup at the VA and updated his status: “The doc said I have the body of a twenty-year-old.” Me being, you know, me, I commented underneath, “Ah, but a twenty-year-old what?”

He laughed because of course he did. Because Gary was Gary, and if you know, you know. And if you don’t, then you missed something rare and wonderful.

I’m not sure how long ago that particular exchange happened. A dozen years, maybe twenty. It doesn’t really matter. What does matter is the footprint he left. Big, big shoes.

Gary brought out the best in us because he saw the best in us. Over the many years I was blessed to count him as a friend, we had innumerable “on the wall” interactions and many behind the scenes. And in both places, he was always the same great guy. The one who took a little goodhearted ribbing without ever taking offense. The one who never used another’s insecurities to knock them down a peg. Instead, he’d acknowledge your tender spots and provide genuine assurance that you were doing better than you were giving yourself credit for. He accepted and loved you, even when you screwed up and if you were one of his—and his reach was wide—he’d lean in and love you harder when you needed it most.

The man was human salve. I doubt he’d have described himself that way, but Gary was a healer. A healer, and a man who served. There’s a poem I’ve loved since I was a child. It’s called Abou Ben Adhem, and though it doesn’t describe Gary perfectly because unlike Ben Adhem, Gary was a man of great faith, I believe Gary is at the very heart of the poem. I hope you’ll take a moment to read it.

Husband. Father. Grandfather. Great-grandfather. U.S. Navy Vet. Union strong. Friend. Neighbor. Ally. Voice of reason. Patriot, in the finest sense of the word. Child of God.

I’ll miss you, my dear friend.

Bethie

~*~*~*~*~*~

(GBE Topic #1: Loss)

18 thoughts on “Missing Gary”

  1. Oh honey, that described him perfectly! When people talk about something being heartfelt, it’s true, because this blog made me feel it in my heart. Miss you too, Gary.

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  2. Your words always touch my soul, this one was different. Losing Pops hurt big time. But I know he is in a better place and singing with the angels and looking on Jesus’s face. Well done Beth. We all miss him. xoxo

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    1. This really was a hard loss. I hope he knew just how much he meant to so many. My guess is her felt the love but I doubt he could have possibly known how deeply he’d be missed. ❤

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  3. Second try to comment!

    My eyes have watered my face, my hearts memories reignited from your post! Pops…how I miss him! I still keep looking at the responses to my post…and he isn’t there 💔. This was (as usual), a beautifully written blogl. Glad to see us back! Love you, Beth.

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  6. That was a beautiful and loving tribute to Gary. You have such a gift with words and you described Gary so lovingly that it brought a tear. Love you EG❤️

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  7. I think I forgot how your writing touches me. Also how you “speak” to my heart from your own.
    I’ve missed you and this experience. I am sure if Gary read this he would be so very proud and would then comment:
    “Who is this Gary? I’d like to know him.”

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  8. I’m so happy that you’re back to blogging!

    I didn’t know Gary but I miss him now. And I loved the poem! I don’t know anything about poetry other than how I feel during and after reading something and this one made me feel not only good, but optimistic.

    (I clicked on Leigh Hunt’s name which linked to his biography and he looks exactly like Eddie Munster!)

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    1. My relationship with poetry is exactly the same as yours. Zero knowledge, buy I know what I like. And I just clicked to look at the poet, and you’re right! Eddie for sure!

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